Angela: So, I’ve heard of some single adults thinking “intra-ward” dating is a bad idea, but I’ve never heard of someone refusing a date because of it. Tell us a little more about you’re situation.
Lookin’ for love: Yes, it has happened maybe 5 different times now within the last 6 months. I’ll meet a guy who seems decent, I’ll invite him to do something, and then I’ll get this incredulous look from him like, “How dare I cross that line and ask someone out in my own ward.” And then he’ll decline for that reason, albeit politely.
A: That seems so strange to me. Do you ever ask any follow up like, “Oh really? Why not? There are great girls in this ward?”
L: No, I never do. It’s embarrassing enough to get turned down when you ask someone out, so I’m just trying to get out of there as fast as possible.
A: I definitely understand. Have you ever seen any of these guys dating other the other girls in the ward?
L: That’s the thing, people are so secretive about who they are dating. I used to live in Utah and if someone was dating that meant they were sitting next to each other in church with their arms all wrapped around each other in the pews practically making out. In Boston, I haven’t seen much of that, so I have no idea who these guys are dating – they just aren’t dating me! But if I had to guess, I would say yes, they are dating other girls.
A: Oh yeah? Why would you guess that?
L: Because who else are they dating? If they want to marry an LDS girl, then they have to date LDS girls, and we’re all in this ward! So, I’m pretty sure it’s just me which is depressing as [heck], lol.
A: Haha, okay. Yes, that’s a good deduction. Well, I give my opinion on “intra-ward” dating in Saturday’s ‘Ask Angela’ article. Thank you for sharing your story and I look forward to our follow up interview.
I know in today’s article I said it’s a bad idea to assume things, that has always gotten me in trouble, but if I got the don’t-date-girls-in-my-ward excuse even just once…I’d never ask anyone out ever again. Which is too bad. But, in asking people about this, someone compared dating within your ward to “peeing in the swimming pool,” and that it’s the “worst idea ever.” So, lots of different perspectives. What do you think?
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