Forgiveness and Reconciliation, there’s a difference

Hey so I know you guys are getting sick of me talking about forgiveness BUT, I skimmed read this really great article about the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. It basically says the two are related, but not the same. You can forgive someone without being reconciled to them.

In my model, forgiveness is an internal process where you work through the hurt, gain an understanding of what happened, rebuild a sense of safety, and let go of the grudge.

The offending party is not necessarily a part of this process.

On the other hand, reconciliation is an interpersonal process where you dialogue with the offender about what happened, exchange stories, express the hurt, listen for the remorse, and begin to reestablish trust. It’s a much more complicated, involved process that includes, but moves beyond forgiveness. Forgiveness is solo, reconciliation is a joint venture.

So, I’m sure you have forgiven a lot of people…is there anyone with whom you’d like to be reconciled?

Read the full article here.

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